Orlando Local

Another August, another hurricane. There are a few things you can always expect with a hurricane coming to town.

1: Tony Mainolfi (WESH) will start fear mongering.
2: All sorts of people will give you preparation advice and dire warnings.
3: Lazy bastards who didn't get their supplies before the fear mongering will clog the roads, stores, and gas stations.
4: The local officials in the Keys will tell the tourists to get out (so they can make room for the hard core hurricane party folks).
5: Lots of people will lose power.
6: Lots of people will charge too much for something after it's over (ice, tree clearing, etc.)
7: We'll get warned about the next "disturbance in the tropics" before we've finished talking about this one.
8: It's a day without work, but still a suck-ass day.
9: The local lead news story will change to hurricane news.

Those of you who don't have water, ice and Pop-Tarts at your house already have been very annoying to me today. I have my act together, why don't you? You know this is going to happen at some point, so why the late rush to get batteries, water, and whatever else with the crowd of other morons? Buy this stuff in the Spring so you don't have to worry about it later.

The down side is that Sunday is my regular grocery day, so I've been caught up with the rest of you goobers while I try to get my regular fix of green grapes and turkey sandwich stuff. Remember your Boy Scout days (or show me your Girl Scout pictures): Be Prepared...then get out of my way. I'm looking for some grapes.

Most people are writing about fireworks and other celebrations today. That's outstanding and I don't fault them for it. However, I want to use the spirit of the day to remind us that our independence is under challenge and assault every day.

This clip is of Orlando Police officers denying a WFTV camera man the same basic rights allowed to other citizens simply because he carries a camera. They threaten him with arrest, even claiming they've already arrested another media person for trying to assert the same civil rights as others - to walk down a sidewalk. Clearly, the Orlando Police officers on the scene do not trust photographers and they are using coercion (threat of arrest) to prevent him from lawfully engaging in the same activity as others. Coercion is illegal in all 50 states.

Journalists and media have no more rights to access to a crime scene or police investigation than an ordinary citizen. They are ordinary citizens. That means they should also have the same rights. If the police allow people to access an area, they must allow ALL people to access an area. The law doesn't make exception for them to discriminate just because someone has a camera.

Enjoy our Independence, but keep your eyes open for those who would abuse their authority to curtail our freedoms. Orlando Police are among them.

Hawaiian Tropic Bikini Contest - 127, originally uploaded by wbeem.

I just read that 25-year-old Orlando woman, Samantha Harris, will be in the July Playboy issue as part of a 6-page article about the Cyber Girls.

Personally, I think she deserves to be the Playmate of the Month. Maybe it'll happen in time.

I grabbed this shot during the 2007 Hawaiian Tropic Swimsuit Contest.

I found this on The Disney Blog and had to share it. You never know when you need a Dancing Wookie fix.

The Face and Body Art International Conference is in town again. Once again, I'm there taking photos and enjoying the wonderful people who make great art. It runs through this weekend and I'll post a fuller story when it's done. For now, here are a few samples of the work these people create.

Forget the Orlando Magic and the playoffs. Those guys are just professional entertainers. If you want real sports, you have to watch real athletes who compete because it's in their soul. That's what I did this weekend at Disney's Wide World of Sports and the Magic Kingdom. It reminded me of my childhood youth, before cable, when the only thing to watch on a weekend was either Ron Ely as Tarzan or ABC's Wide World of Sports. I can hear it now...

Spanning the globe to bring you the constant variety of sport...

The thrill of victory...

The agony of defeat...

The human drama of athletic competition...

This is Orlando's Wide World of Sports!

I first attended the Muddy Buddy and the Danskin Triathlon events last year due to my friends (below) competing in them and decided to go again this year. Let's face it, I'm not a big sports fan. In fact, I can't think of anything more annoying than the voice of a sports announcer. Fortunately, it's easier to tune those voices out of your head when you're actually at a competitive event. It gets even easier when you concentrate on photographing the event. I took over 1500 shots at the Muddy Buddy and about 500 at the Danskin Triathlon.

Both events start too damn early (7:00 am and 6:00 am respectively) and I had to wake up two hours before start time each day so I could get ready, make the drive down to Disney, and be there about a half hour before the start.

One thing that amazes me is how people find each other at these events. The Muddy Buddy had 2800 competitors. That's more than enough people, but then you have to add in all of their supporters. Let's just say it makes for some interesting traffic and crowds. Despite all of that, I still managed to find my friends before the race. Normally, you'd think that a couple of girls dressed up like chickens in bright yellow would stand out, but not at the Muddy Buddy. People are encouraged to wear some interesting costumes.

The Danskin Triathlon kicks off in Orlando every year on Mother's Day at the Magic Kingdom. In some ways, I'm less thrilled about this one than the Muddy Buddy. They do far more to restrict the spectators and it's nearly impossible to get a decent photograph without part of someone's head or hand in the way. This year, one woman who finished the race decided to stand right in front of me before the finish line so she could High Five the other competitors as they neared the end. Not only did I wish she'd get out of the way of my photos, but she also confused many of the competitors into thinking that they'd already finished the race when the end was still 10 yards away. More than once the crowd had to tell those women that it wasn't over yet. They still have to run over the matt to record their finish time electronically. Basically, this nice old woman screwed over everyone with her enthusiasm.

Still, you can't help but admire the people who compete. Keep in mind that the vast majority of these folks aren't Olympic or Iron Man competitors. They're your friends and neighbors. They may be old, fat or physically disabled. Some of the fastest competitors in both races were amputees. Maria Katz hopped into the water on one foot for her swim, she rode her bike without a prosthesis, and then she raced to the finish with her prosthesis. Here's the part that amazes me. Her swim time was faster than a friend of mine who won first place in her age group.

This is why I don't really care about professional sports. Those guys are just paid to put butts in the seats. They don't have another day job. They're literally at the top of their game and have every advantage to be there. The folks I saw this weekend were just like you and me. Some of them are incredible athletes, but all of them got off their ass long enough to work up a sweat and have a good time. You have to admire those folks.

More Honesty, originally uploaded by wbeem.

I saw this guy in standing by the Amway Arena before the Rush concert on Tuesday evening. I couldn't help it, I had to snap a photo with my iPhone. I told the guy I'd give him a couple of bucks for the photo. He smiled and approved, but told me I'd have to come closer because he wasn't allowed to leave his area.

You see those little blue marks on the ground to his right? That's the designated panhandling area allowed in the City of Orlando. As long as he stays in that box, he can hold his sign and collect whatever money comes his way.

Generally, I don't want to be bothered with people begging for money. If his sign had said anything else, I probably would've ignored him. However, I admired his honesty and humor. The guy was genuinely nice and articulate, too. We talked briefly about Rush. He remembered seeing them for the first time in 1974 for $4.50. I paid $109.50 for my ticket that night. Times change.

The news is playing about an event that happened last year. Orlando Police Officer Fernando Trinidad pushed a woman down the stairs at a downtown club. As a result, he lost 8 hours of vacation pay. Seriously, that's all that happened to the dude. Eight hours is one day of vacation. Poor guy. He's still on the streets, badge in one hand and gun in the other.

Not only did Officer Trinidad push a woman down the stairs, but then he arrested her on a trumped up felony charge. He lied to make it seem like he was the victim, she spit on him, yada yada yada. Fortunately, the thing got caught on the club's security camera where he was hired for an off-duty job. If you haven't seen it already, here's a clip from WKMG news showing what happened.

So why didn't he get more punishment? According to a statement by Orlando Police Chief Val Demings (who was then Deputy Chief, I'm told), it's because his civil rights were violated. The police union filed a grievance to protect the officer because he wasn't informed about the charges that launched the investigation.

This smells like the blue code of silence to me. Yet another law enforcement officer abuses his authority and someone on the inside helps him cover it up. We wouldn't be hearing about it now if the video hadn't come up. The victim is suing the cop and now there is a criminal investigation. The state may actually do what Orlando Police failed to do - cost this officer his job by invalidating his certification.

I was all set to write a scathing rant against this cop and the Orlando Police Department, but what good would it do? This is just another case of a cop out of control. Watch the video again. Notice how casually he shoves her down the stairs and walks past her like nothing happened. Equally bad is his partner. He's complicit with the crime by not taking action or speaking up about the bogus charges. This woman wanted to be a teacher. I bet her application looks real good with a felony arrest on it. What was her crime? Under what circumstances does a cop push someone from behind down a flight of stairs?

There's no point in ranting, though. Cops are as corrupt as ever. All of the hope and excitement around Val Demings becoming the first black woman to be Chief of Police in Orlando is over. She's just as bad as the rest of them. Now, on the evening news, she admits that the punishment was insufficient. However, her hands are tied because they can't punish him again. Remember, they took away 8 hours of vacation time. We wouldn't want to be unfair to a bully with a badge, would we? After all, he's got a union behind him.

This is police brutality on video. The police and the union both tried to squash it. Next time you see a cop, will you trust him? If you call the police and Officer Trinidad shows up, would you want him in your house? I damn sure wouldn't.

Have you ever seen this car driving around town? I swear I've seen it on I-4 for a while now and it always makes me wonder. Who the hell would do something like this?

I know, it's a crappy image, but what do you expect? I was driving about 60 mph down I-4 in Downtown Orlando, fumbling around for a Canon SD800 point & shoot camera, it's starting to rain, and I'm trying to avoid hitting other cars around me. Still, I wanted to get a picture of this car.

Seriously, who owns this car and why is it so festively decorated. I mean, Jesus (no pun), there's even stuff on the roof in case a helicopter flies over it.

There are letters on the back, on the side, on the roof, on the hood, the other side. It's one big Jesus-O-Rama car. Apparently, Jesus is real and driving a light-blue sedan around Orlando. Maybe it's the second coming of Christ. Maybe it's just someone who has a poor grasp on reality.

There are a lot of people in the area who have faith. My mom is one of them. She has a tiny little cross hanging from her rear-view mirror. I don't see what good it does her, since she barely drives a thousand miles in a year, but I guess it's good enough to get her to church and back.

This car's owner is just way, way over the top. It's not enough for him (or her) to have a quiet faith like so many others do. This person has to cram it down your throat whether you believe or not. In fact, you're not allowed to disbelieve in the presence of this car. It's the Jesus car. You can tell by the rainbow letters proclaiming that JESUS IS REAL and JESUS LOVES YOU! Great. That's nice. Now stop driving 15 miles per hour slower than the rest of traffic on I-4.

According to the St. Pete Times, there's a new fantasy camp in town. Who wants to be a porn star? Apparently, at least a couple dozen people in Tampa this weekend who shelled out $4,000 a head (no jokes about big or little) to attend.

So what do you get for your money? Priceless information about:

1: Porn star pay scales
2: Set design
3: Lighting
4: Web site design
5: Your own hard-core porno scene!

The good news is that you get a lot of information and possibly a chance to score on camera. The bad news is that you don't own the rights to your scene. It may show up on a DVD sometime in the future, or just uploaded on the web. I guess that would be a hell of a thing to have show up next time someone does a Google search on your name. I can see it happening in a job background search.

"Mr. Johnson, I see you have some experience you didn't list on your resume. Would you mind telling me how you ended up in this porno scene with two midgets and a goat?"

Honestly, it's a smart move for Courtney. She probably realizes that there's a lot of money to make on the other side of the camera and giving these educational camps. it's common in many other lines of interest, such as photography or racing. People are willing to shell out big bucks to gain professional insight to a business. We've had porn on the Internet for years, but it's rising with sites like YouPorn.com or RedTube.com.

The Tampa area is a little hotbed of porn activity. There are plenty of potential actors in the area and the community seems to be growing. Given the mainstream acceptance and viability of porn, it may be a smart business move during hard economic times. If people can't afford to go out to eat, at least they can stay home and jack off.

A few weeks ago, I was sitting in my house and heard some engines racing outside. It happens, 46-A isn't that far away and sometimes you hear a car or motorcycle decide to rev it up on a straight-away. However, this engine sound didn't go away. I sounded like someone was racing around my neighborhood. Once I ventured outside, I found the truth surprised me.

There, in the middle of the road at dusk, was my next-door neighbor racing his small child in go-karts on the street. For the life of me, I was dumb-founded by the incredible stupidity of it. No lights. No helmet or protective clothing. Low to the ground. Racing in poor light. There was a grown man putting his kid at risk just for a little "fun." All it would've taken was for someone to pull out of a driveway or turn a corner. Splat. They may have never even seen the go-kart or had any reason to expect one to be scooting around the road. Fortunately, they called it a night before anything went wrong.

Another young boy wasn't so luck this weekend. William Pfifer crashed an ATV into a house and was in critical condition yesterday. He wasn't riding in the street, nor was he wearing a helmet.

The federal Consumer Product Safety Commission reported that in 2001 97 percent of children under the age of 16 who were hurt by ATVs were on machines larger than recommended.

The top ten contributing factors in an ATV accident are:

1. Inexperience.
2. No helmet.
3. Children riding full-sized ATVs.
4. Carrying passengers.
5. No supervision.
6. Riding on public roads.
7. Use of alcohol.
8. High rate of speed.
9. Doing stunts/showing off.
10. Unseen obstacles.

I'm not necessarily opposed to kids learning how to operate a motor vehicle at a young age, but you just don't turn them loose and hope for the best. It wouldn't hurt to set a good example. How can you expect your child to exercise good judgment if you're racing a go-kart in the street at dusk right there with him? If you want to share some go-kart racing with your child, visit one of the local attractions like Fun World on Hwy 17-92 (part of Flea World).

Effective July 1, 208, anyone under age 16 operating an off-highway vehicle must have in his or her possession a certificate evidencing the satisfactory completion of an approved off-highway vehicle safety course in this state or another jurisdiction. If you don't know where to find training, ask your dealer. The Motorcycle Safety Foundation sponsors Dirt Bike schools for children as young as six years old. While you're registering your child, sign yourself up for a course, too.

Honda has a safety slogan with a bit of truth in it:

Daytona Beach has a problem. Spring Break is in full swing now, but the folks in Daytona want to preserve their reputation as a family-friendly destination. The recent arrival of the Girls Gone Wild party bus flies smack in the face of that reputation.

Honestly, what the hell is wrong with the folks in charge of Daytona's government? The city is a tourist town, but it's targeting the people who are least likely to spend money - families. We're in a recession. Family budgets are tighter than a coon's ass. The only reason they're going to Daytona outside of special events is because they're cheap. This is not a way to build a healthy economy.

Learn from Las Vegas, Daytona. Cater to the sinners. Let the Spring Breakers party their asses off. Show some skin and make the place seem like FUN for a change, rather than the place where old & fat people go to bake in the sun and then eat breakfast at the IHOP.

When Daytona was getting its Spring Break party on with MTV in the 80's, Las Vegas experimented with family-friendly marketing. Guess what? It doesn't work. Families are worried about bills to pay. Families are boring and dull. They don't make for a vibe that attracts more tourists.

On the other hand, people on vacation love a party. Those college kids here on Spring Break come a lot closer to being the attractive person you put on a brochure than some of the people staying in your hotels. Attractive people partying in your town will bring more people, more money, and a better economy.

So loosen up, Daytona. Let people have a beer on the beach. Open up your nudie bars the way God intended. Try to realize that it's better to have tourists clogging your roads than to have empty hotel beds that don't bring in any revenue for local businesses. You're a tourist destination. Start acting like one.

I remember Spring Break in the 80's. Lots of skin. Lots of hot pink bikinis. Lots of alcohol. Lots of sex. Lots of loud music. Basically, it was a party/ That's pretty much all you need for Spring Break at the beach. At least, that's what I thought.

However, Daytona decided that was too much and wanted to crack down on all those rowdy kids. They pour out the kids beer on the beach, setup a temporary jail, and control the hell out of the Spring Breakers.

Except, things are wilder now than ever before. Two of the reports from WESH News spring to mind. A security guard hired for a hotel raped an 18 year old girl and then tossed her off a 6th floor balcony. She hit the second floor and survived and the rapist was arrested. Then there's the story of three kids from Illinois & Ohio. It seemed they detonated a 1/4 stick of dynamite on their patio the other night and blew the windows out of a couple of rooms.

Maybe the drinking and screwing around weren't so bad after all. At least then people weren't getting thrown over balconies (though some fell on their own) and they weren't blowing shit up.

I was just checking concert tour listings on Pollstar to see who was coming to town. Orlando's Matchbox Twenty is on the Top 50 list with a tour. There are two Florida dates: Hollywood on January 25th and Tampa on the next night.

So what about Orlando? The hometown isn't good enough for the boys who used to play at The Mill? I think the last time they played here was back in 2003. Actually, it was a great show. They played up the hometown angle and Rob Thomas wanted to call the venue the "O-Rena" just for the night. They did a great cover of U2's "Where the Streets Have No Name", too.

Don't expect any love from Matchbox Twenty this time around, Orlando. I guess they've outgrown us.

Are the Las Vegas hotels getting so full of themselves that they're collectively killing the goose who lays the golden egg? It's possible. Hotel rates for popular conferences like the Consumer Electronics Show (CES) are astronomical. Hotel rates have risen 365 percent in the last two years, according to this story by Richard N. Velotta with In Business Las Vegas. Perhaps most telling is this excerpt from the article:

Executives with the Consumer Electronics Association, the owner of the show, approached the LVCVA earlier this year for a meeting with resort executives to try to persuade them to keep prices in check.

Karen Chupka, senior vice president of events and conferences for the association, said several exhibitors have had to reduce the number of delegates they can send to the show because companies can no longer afford to send as many people as in the past.

"It's crazy," Chupka said. "The rates have become astronomical. Some of the resorts are requiring a food and beverage guarantee on top of the hotel rooms and that has gone up by 365 percent in the past two years. Las Vegas is no longer the cost-effective destination it once was."

Chicago and Orlando were mentioned in the article as two possible alternatives to Las Vegas, since there are few choices that have capacity for the 140,000 visitors that CES draws. Considering the timing of the event during the first week of January, Chicago would be a bleak alternative. One good snowstorm could ruin the entire event for everyone. With Orlando's temperatures traditionally around 72 degrees at this time of year, my guess is that we'd be the odds-on favorite for a potential relocation if the show stays within the USA.

One event that tagged on to CES and has grown with it is the AVN Adult Entertainment
Expo. My guess is that Orlando's family-friendly image wouldn't go well with a porn expo. Don't get me wrong, I'd love to attend and take some pictures, but it's just not going to happen here. Orlando's power players don't want that crowd nestling up to the kids going to Disney World, and the porn folks don't want to fly across the country to a town that just doesn't have the nightlife facilities to accommodate them. If CES moves to Orlando, look for the AVN Adult Expo to stay in Las Vegas. It's a short trip from the LA area where many of them reside and Vegas embraces the Sin City nature of overused and scantily clad women roving through its hotels.

CES in Orlando would be a great way to start the new year. Unfortunately, I don't see any signs that the folks in Orlando recognize the potential opportunity, much less their efforts to steal the show away from Las Vegas.

I went to B.B. King's Blues Club last night in Pointe Orlando. The place just opened the night before, but I couldn't make it for opening night. Fortunately, B.B. was playing for a few nights this week and I finally got a chance to see him perform live. It's not like he hasn't been to Orlando before. It's not like I haven't asked my friends to go with me to see B.B. King perform in Orlando before. The problem in the past is that every single friend I've ever asked to go with my, those friends who seemed enthusiastic about going to his show, always flaked out and caused me to miss the concert. The reasons are numerous and lame. Tonight, I said "screw my friends." I went alone so nobody could mess it up for me.

I called the club earlier in the day to ensure that I could get a ticket. The lady who answered confirmed there were seats available and I opted for the $125 ticket. It wasn't the prime seat at the stage, but just a bit behind those folks. The price included a prix fixe meal from the club, also. I could arrive between 5:00 pm and 8:00 pm for dinner and B.B. started at 9:00 pm. I asked about their policy on photography. She told me that I should bring something concealable, as there's no flash photography allowed. I asked a few more questions, and I got the impression it'd be a hassle if I brought my Nikon D200. Instead, I just brought my little Canon P&S camera, which is much like bringing a cocktail umbrella to a tropical storm. It's there, but useless.

First Impressions

Once I got there, the night started off a bit wrong. They couldn't find my seat. The manager walked me all around the club and didn't know where it was. He passed me to someone else, who in turn passed me to another girl named Susan. Susan comped me a free drink and promised she'd make it right. It took her a while, and she mentioned giving me a full refund and putting me in a lesser table than I bought. I just smiled and told her that I trust her to work it out. It turns out they'd seated some other woman in my chair.

After almost a half-hour, they ended up putting me in a seat directly in line with B.B. King, sandwiched right between some of the fattest people I could've imagined. While that initially set me back, I have to say that both of them were are nice as could be and I didn't feel overly cramped for the night. A couple more rum & cokes came at me and I got my meal. Life was good.

These pictures are going to suck. Most people have these crappy little P&S shooters or their cell phones, but there are obviously some folks with their digital SLR's shooting with no problem. I should've brought my D200. Another opportunity lost because I didn't want to push it a bit.

Al around the club, inside and outside, you find traditional Memphis blues art like this photo reveals. You recognize it immediately as something a 3rd grader could've painted. I'm not sure why blues music equates with really poor painting, but at least it conveys enough that you're supposed to recognize the musicians depicted.

The Food

On a night like this, things run smoother for the staff if guests have limited options. I knew ahead of time that this event would have a prix fixe menu, though I didn't know what options were on it.

Your only real choice is whether you want BBQ Salmon or BBQ Chicken & Ribs. What the hell, I went for the chicken & ribs and skipped the salad (I hate lettuce).

I can honestly attest that the ribs met the definition of being so tender that the meat falls off the bone. That's because, as I brought one of the ribs to my mouth, the meat fell off the bone onto my plate. The BBQ sauce tasted like some kind of bourbon/BBQ glaze. It worked for me, because I didn't leave any ribs or chicken behind. The mashed potatoes were fine. The other two sides didn't really appeal to me. Just for the hell of it, I tried the macaroni & cheese. It was bland, tasteless, and rubbery. The cornbread muffin that came with the meal was also fine, but not extremely flavorful.

Years ago, I ate at the B.B. King restaurant in New York City and remember feeling disappointed. I was prepared for a mundane meal, but I think that's the case for a lot of theme restaurants. My meal last night wasn't bad at all, but it wasn't outstanding. If I were going solely on the basis of a meal, I probably wouldn't make the trip back. It's not that much of a draw.

For desert, you didn't have a choice. The menu called for a Bourbon Pecan Pie. I didn't have my hopes up, as I'm really not a fan of pecans and didn't expect much from the pie. Damn, was I wrong. They served a little individual pie that was absolutely wonderful. The portion size was just right and I loved the flavor. This little desert elevated my opinion of the offerings enough that I may go back to try a few other dishes.

Opening Act

The staff was friendly, the food was OK, and the desert surprised me. However, the reason I came here was for the music. The opening act is the house band, The B.B. King All Stars. These folks exceeded my expectations. The first two numbers were instrumental covers of some Booker T and the MG's songs. The band was tight and right on the mark. Four horns, two guitars, keyboards, bass and drums filled up the sound and didn't overwhelm by being too loud. The sound crew had to level out a few things, something I would've expected them to do before the show began. Otherwise, I had no complaints. After the first two instrumental numbers, the male and female vocalists came out to share some duets and their own songs. Again, I was just floored with the great performance delivered that night. Although I came out to hear B.B. King play, I was thrilled with the notion that there's a great Blues/R&B band in Orlando that I can hear seven nights a week if I get in the mood. This band is outstanding. Go hear them live.

The Main Event

This is one of the first times I can remember wishing that the opening act played longer before bringing on the main event. I definitely have to go see them again when they can play longer or for more sets. Still, B.B. was the reason I was there. His band came out, set things up, and opened the night with a pair of instrumental numbers. Once again, another outstanding band filled the stage. It's such a joy to see a polished group perform and they didn't disappoint.

They introduced B.B. King and he came out, as expected, to a standing ovation. People love this guy, and it was easy to see why. He's kind, talkative, genuinely funny, full of facial expressions, and really knows how to connect with his audience. He's 82 years old and his voice is strong and he can play the hell out of his guitar. He told the crowd that he's diabetic, his knees don't work so well, his head doesn't, either. Even so, he's still traveling the world and performing. Maybe that's what keeps him alert and alive. It definitely seems to make him happy.

B.B. shares the stage well, making sure that every talented musician on his stage has an opportunity to shine. Maybe he shares a little too well. For the first half hour, he didn't play his guitar that much. Although he opened up with a few licks to show his chops, he hadn't really touched the guitar that much. Fortunately, it seems that's just the way he designs his sets to let the band show off a bit, and the later parts of the show feature his playing as you would expect.

There's a more laid back feeling to B.B.'s show. The opening act was energetic and almost breathtaking. B.B.'s show is more of a simmer with occasional moments of boiling hot. With over 90 CD's and 500 singles behind him, there's no way he can perform it all. His songs ranged over the decades, including a very differently arranged version of U2's "When Love Comes to Town." There are some staged moments of comedy, even in the middle of songs.

In between songs, or sometimes during them, B.B. talks to his audience to share his thoughts, experiences, and humor. Sometimes it's a fatherly talk. He tells how he believes that women are a gift from God (and they believe it, too). He also laments that no matter what a father does, he first thing a kid is going to do when he gets on TV is say "Hi, Mom." Dads never win. Then he tries to inspire the men to treat their women right so they can go home and get some. Now that's a fatherly talk with a message I can appreciate.

B.B. King's show isn't designed to blow you away. It's designed to be a good night out with some good music and humor, something just to make you feel good. It worked for me. It also seemed to work for some blonde girl standing behind me. Somewhere along the last half of the show, I felt her arm slowly crawl around my neck (never a bad feeling). She was taking pictures of the show and decided to wrap her arms around me to steady herself. Sometimes she'd take pictures of the show, then she'd slowly turn the camera toward me. I finally tried to get a snapshot of her. This picture sucks, but it was the best of the bunch.

I have no idea who she is and I didn't ask her name since she appeared to be there with some other guy. However, she helped make my night complete. Even though I went to the show alone, it doesn't mean I minded having a beautiful woman crawl around on me. I gotta go back to this bar.

I originally posted article this on the Orlando Sentinel's Sanford Community blog:

Fear and ignorance. If you don't understand something, it must be evil and sinister. Fear and ignorance. What better place to teach this system than in Seminole County Schools?

The problem was clear. Kids only have a limited amount of time to go through the lunch line and eat before they get back to class. The line sometimes takes too long as kids fiddle around punching in their PIN number to draw payment access for lunch. Sometimes a kid forgets his PIN, so the line slows down. The intended solution was to use a fingerprint scanning device. No memory required, just bring your finger.

It would be a perfect solution, if not for the fear and ignorance of the parents of these kids. To many minds, fingerprints have a negative stigma because they've been used so long by law enforcement to identify criminals. They also fear the theft of their child's identity by use of these systems. Their fears wouldn't be so bad if they weren't so ignorant of the way biometric systems actually worked.

Law enforcement agencies have used fingerprints to successfully identify people for more than a century. Let's face it, police wouldn't still use fingerprints if they weren't more than reasonably accurate at identifying an individual. Law enforcement isn't the only use of fingerprinting, but it's prominent enough that people still feel a stigma when asked to submit their fingerprints.

Biometric systems like the fingerprint readers use in schools, or at Walt Disney World, don't keep an image of a subject's fingerprints on record. There's no way for someone to steal your fingerprint from the system and use it elsewhere to impersonate you. Instead, the biometric systems only store a pattern known as minutiae - the specific points on a fingerprint where the lines diverge or converge. When fingerprint scanners look at your fingerprint, it's only searching to see if those points on your fingerprint match an existing record. No other fingerprint will match the same set of minutiae, and you cannot use minutiae to build an image of a fingerprint.

While the parent's fear of identity theft from a collection of minutiae are unfounded. Their fear is from ignorance. That's where our Seminole County Schools truly failed. In order to implement this system, the school system should have educated the parents to alleviate their fear. Now the parents may rightly feel distrustful of a school system that didn't communicate details about a sensitive topic. As a result, the lunch lines will still move slower than necessary. Equipment and systems procured by the school system for fingerprint scanners will probably sit unused as a minor monument to tax dollar waste, all because of a failure to alleviate fear and ignorance.

A few days ago, I wrote a post based upon an original statement from Miceage.com claiming that the boats on the It's a Small World ride in Disneyland were bottoming out and getting stuck due to the growing size of the average American visitor. The concept was that the ride, designed for the 1964-1965 World's Fair, could not accommodate the greater weight of visitors 43 years later. It sounds reasonable.

However, I wanted to dig into this idea a little more. Were there similar concerns for boat rides in Walt Disney World, such as the version of It's a Small World or Pirates of the Caribbean here in Orlando?

I contacted representatives from Walt Disney World to pose the question and received the following answer. Although the Disneyland ride It's a Small World is closing down, it is not because guests are weighing down the boats. The boats are 43 years old and have had repairs throughout the year. Per the Walt Disney representative, the repairs had a cumulative effect to correct wear & tear on the bottom of the boat that essentially increased the depth of the boat. Think of it as one layer of repair upon another.

One of the questions still on my mind is how Walt Disney World deals with the growing size of the average visitor and some of the aging attractions that may not have been designed for additional wait. The short answer is that Disney Engineers regularly inspect the attractions to maintain a safe environment for guests. Many aspects of Walt Disney World were designed with accessibility in mind to accommodate all guests.

So what about the issue of an aging infrastructure and changing guest sizes? We'll have to find out in another post, as the Disney representative promised to ask a few more questions and get back to me with an answer.

Whether you believe that guests are too larger or the repairs have added depth to the boat, it's undeniable that Disneyland is taking action to correct a problem.

Orlando Magic fans are up in arms at the start of the NBA season this year. Why? Due to a string of actions, they can't watch 35 Magic games on the local cable provider - Bright House Networks. Local fans with Dish Network & DirecTV subscriptions aren't affected, so they're gloating - at least on game days when it doesn't rain.

Here's how it all unfolded. The Orlando Magic sold the rights to televise their games. Unfortunately for fans, those rights did not include any stipulation that the games would get aired locally. FSN Florida bought the rights to the Magic games. About a week or so ago, FSN made a deal with Dish and DirectTV to broadcast Orlando Magic games.

Bright House already carries Sun Sports, which has rights to broadcast 40 Magic games that will air on the cable provider's networks. Bright House would like to add FSN for its Sports Tier, which would add to the cost for subscribers. FSN doesn't want to be part of a tier, it wants to be in the overall channel line-up available to all Bright House subscribers. Bright House claims, correctly, that doing so would raise the cost of service.

So it comes down to whether a few Magic fans are willing to pay more to watch those games at home on a Sports Tier, or whether Bright House will raise the subscriber cost to ALL of its customers in order to carry the Orlando Magic games. After all, you know Bright House isn't going to take the hit on that expense without passing it along one way or another.

Personally, I don't care one bit about watching sports. Maybe it'd be different if I attended a college and had some vested interest in the game. Otherwise, what's the point? It's entertainment, nothing more. There's no way I'd want to pay a higher cable cost so Oprah fans could watch additional content, and I think the same thing about the Magic fans. If you want it, pay for it. Here's another idea. Buy a ticket and go watch the game in person. I'm not totally convinced that concept didn't enter the minds of the Orlando Magic administration when they sold the rights without a guarantee to have games air locally, but that's just my own speculation.

Now the town is full of sports fans whining that they can't watch their games at home on TV. Some will abandon Bright House and buy a satellite service. Others will end up going out to Hooters or Ale House to drown their complaints in pitchers of beer while yelling at the TV set. That's all fine with me. Just don't raise my cost in order to provide for these folks.

Pretty soon, they're going to be glad to get out of the house and have a beer, anyway. The writers strike is about to end the soap opera shows, so there are going to be some cranky housewives pretty soon.

It's a Small Small World., originally uploaded by Chris the Fish.

There's an interesting blurb on Miceage about the Small World ride at Disneyland. It seems our west coast friends plan to shut down the ride for 10 months starting next January for some major refurbishment. Why?

The people riding it are just too damn big and the boats keep bottoming out.

According to the article, the boats used in the ride are 43 years old and originally served in the 1964-65 New York World's Fair. They've come to the end of their useful lifespan and need replacement. Wear and tear is part of the reason, but another aspect simply has to do with the size of the average park visitor. When the boats were designed in 1963, the average adult male weighed 175 pounds and the average adult female weighed 137 pound. Fast forward to the present time and it's not hard to conceive that a boat filled with multiple adults weighing more than 200 pounds each is going to hit bottom and stop.

The only notice that a cast member has about a stuck boat is when the everything starts getting backed up and jammed. Some poor soul has to run forward to unclog the overloaded boat and get things moving again. It also means that cast members have learned the art of sizing up visitors and loading them appropriately to avoid potential problems. Unfortunately, it's not something that they can easily explain to guests without hurting some feelings.

"I'm sorry that I can't accommodate your entire family reunion on this 43 year old boat, but you're all just too heavy to go anywhere."

So how does this issue affect boat rides at Walt Disney World like It's a Small World and Pirates of the Caribbean? Both of those rides are newer and have already been through refurbishments. Good thing, because I doubt DIsney visitors in Central Florida are magically lighter than their California counterparts.

I'm constantly amazed of our society's fear of women's breasts. Unless you're a beautiful model suntanning in South Beach, a woman just doesn't get any respect for her breasts being exposed in public. In keeping with the notion that bare breasts are bad, Universal Studios Orlando humiliated one of its guests, Cheryl Cruz, when she whipped the puppies out to nurse her baby.

Cruz is Canadian. It appears our neighbors to the north really don't have a problem if a mother decides to breastfeed her baby. Not so at Universal Studios Orlando, though. After Cruz refused to cover up at a park employee's request, she was surrounded by security guards ready to escort her off property. Never mind the fact that it is legal for a woman to breastfeed publicly in Florida.

What exactly is so horrible about a mother feeding her child? Pretty much every one of us nursed a nipple as babies. It's nothing sexual, it's just life. Lighten up, people. Stop being boobs.