Recently in Weather Category

Another August, another hurricane. There are a few things you can always expect with a hurricane coming to town.

1: Tony Mainolfi (WESH) will start fear mongering.
2: All sorts of people will give you preparation advice and dire warnings.
3: Lazy bastards who didn't get their supplies before the fear mongering will clog the roads, stores, and gas stations.
4: The local officials in the Keys will tell the tourists to get out (so they can make room for the hard core hurricane party folks).
5: Lots of people will lose power.
6: Lots of people will charge too much for something after it's over (ice, tree clearing, etc.)
7: We'll get warned about the next "disturbance in the tropics" before we've finished talking about this one.
8: It's a day without work, but still a suck-ass day.
9: The local lead news story will change to hurricane news.

Those of you who don't have water, ice and Pop-Tarts at your house already have been very annoying to me today. I have my act together, why don't you? You know this is going to happen at some point, so why the late rush to get batteries, water, and whatever else with the crowd of other morons? Buy this stuff in the Spring so you don't have to worry about it later.

The down side is that Sunday is my regular grocery day, so I've been caught up with the rest of you goobers while I try to get my regular fix of green grapes and turkey sandwich stuff. Remember your Boy Scout days (or show me your Girl Scout pictures): Be Prepared...then get out of my way. I'm looking for some grapes.

Have you ever seen this car driving around town? I swear I've seen it on I-4 for a while now and it always makes me wonder. Who the hell would do something like this?

I know, it's a crappy image, but what do you expect? I was driving about 60 mph down I-4 in Downtown Orlando, fumbling around for a Canon SD800 point & shoot camera, it's starting to rain, and I'm trying to avoid hitting other cars around me. Still, I wanted to get a picture of this car.

Seriously, who owns this car and why is it so festively decorated. I mean, Jesus (no pun), there's even stuff on the roof in case a helicopter flies over it.

There are letters on the back, on the side, on the roof, on the hood, the other side. It's one big Jesus-O-Rama car. Apparently, Jesus is real and driving a light-blue sedan around Orlando. Maybe it's the second coming of Christ. Maybe it's just someone who has a poor grasp on reality.

There are a lot of people in the area who have faith. My mom is one of them. She has a tiny little cross hanging from her rear-view mirror. I don't see what good it does her, since she barely drives a thousand miles in a year, but I guess it's good enough to get her to church and back.

This car's owner is just way, way over the top. It's not enough for him (or her) to have a quiet faith like so many others do. This person has to cram it down your throat whether you believe or not. In fact, you're not allowed to disbelieve in the presence of this car. It's the Jesus car. You can tell by the rainbow letters proclaiming that JESUS IS REAL and JESUS LOVES YOU! Great. That's nice. Now stop driving 15 miles per hour slower than the rest of traffic on I-4.

If you're going to live in Central Florida, the thunderstorm capital of America, you need to know how to drive in the rain. We had a pretty good soaker today at the usual time, which is whenever I'm driving home from work.

The common wisdom is that you should slow down when it starts raining. The roads are slick, so you need more time to brake and react. Unfortunately, some people take this wisdom to the extreme, thereby committing stupidity. If you're driving too slow for traffic, then traffic bunches up behind you. Instead of increasing reaction time, you've actually decreased the reaction time of the person behind you.

I drove home behind a few of these extremists tonight, and it seems like the slowest ones were in the left lane. Congratulations! That really makes my day. Not only are you driving 35 mph in a 65 mph speed limit zone, but you're also keeping sane folks from passing you.

Driving too fast in a heavy downpour causes different problems. For example, the white pickup I saw speeding along the 408 today managed to cause the rest of us to slow down. That's because he lost traction on a gentle curve. He had a nice hydroplane going as his pickup truck managed to plow into a tall streetlight post and knock it over. At least he didn't knock the pole over onto other traffic, and he didn't seem injured from his unique brand of stupidity. Some poor county worker now has to come out and fix the damage. I doubt the traffic ticket he receives will cover the cost of replacing that streetlight, so expect to take a hit on your tax dollars if you live in Orange county.

Rain. It's just another opportunity to demonstrate the ill effects of extremism.

5,593. That's how many lightning strikes we've had in Central Florida in the past four hours, according to WESH's Ivan Cabrerra. That's why Central Florida is the Lightning capital of America.

I've been waiting on Ernesto to arrive for a couple of days now. He didn't come here as a hurricane, or even a tropical storm. Ernesto is a tropical depression, and not really even worthy of a name. Still, it's a tropical cyclone and that makes today a storm day.
That's supposed to be like a snow day, for those of you who live in the great white north.

We started off with preparations. People rushed for gas, food, and home supplies. NASA even decided to roll the space shuttle back off the launch pad and back into the VAB for protection. Then, something unprecedented happened. NASA changed its decision and reversed course. Put the shuttle back on the launch pad. This storm is a pansy!

Schools were closed today, and so were some businesses. Then the businesses decided to re-open. Banks opened. Shelters closed. Weathermen were bummed out that we called for a storm and Ernesto showed up, instead. I checked out Technorati to see what the bloggers had to say, but more spoke about Katrina than Ernesto. It's really sad when last year's storm is a better news story than the one hitting home today.

Let's be fair. Ernesto was a hurricane. Ernesto killed two people in Haiti (though there's a good chance two Haitians would've killed each other, anyway. Also, some people in Florida lost electricity (maybe 6,800 from one report I read). Two people died in auto accidents due to slippery roads. Any tropical cyclone causes problems.

On the evening news, they showed people who referred to Ernesto as "a lot of hype over nothing", "overblown", or "just a waste of a workday." These are the people who probably think all storms are this weak. These are the future victims of America, because they won't take precautions for the next storm.

I believe in being prepared, being safe, and knowing that storms are still unpredictable. 2004's Hurricane Charley wasn't supposed to hit us, but it jogged right and came up the I-4 line to blow over my house, knocked out power for weeks, and generally made life miserable. My neighbor lost every tree in his yard during the 2004 hurricane season.

Ernesto is going a fine job, though. Central Florida was somewhere between 8-10 inches below our rainfall for the season. We could use a good soaking without all the damaging winds. That's what we're getting.

Good job, Ernesto.

Ah, the smell of the season's first hurricane. It's not unlike the anticipation of Christmas, only with destruction instead of presents. If you have enough small kids, perhaps the two events are more similar than you'd like to admit.

I won't pretend to give you hurricane updates. You can find that at a number of places. My favorite source is un-official, but excellent. Please check out the flhurricane blog for some interesting analysis and information. Another useful site is the Orlando Sentinel Hurricane Blog. Finally, the state operates Florida Disaster web site.

Although I should consider this good news, I'm a bit disappointed now that the experts tell us Ernesto should remain a tropical storm while over Florida. That's going to take the fire out of the TV news broadcasts. These guys get really excited showing us everything you ever wanted to know about hurricanes. This morning, the WESH weather guy was giving a Cuban history lesson about the Pico Turquino mountains.

It seems that Ernesto was passing this spot, the highest peak in Cuba. That's when he told us how Fidel Castro and his band of merry men hid out for a while. Yeah, nothing like weather and communist history in the making to complete my morning quest for information. Thanks, WESH.

Life gets mildly complicated when a hurricane (or tropical storm) approaches. Expect long lines at grocery stores, gas stations, and home improvement stores.

I started at Publix today. Things were busier than most Monday's after work, but not too cramped. Employees were stocking all over the place. The cashier told me it was busier yesterday and this morning. I figured it wouldn't hurt to get some bottles of water and some snack foods, just in case the power goes out and I can't cook. I must've picked up five pounds of grapes, too.

Next, I needed gas. I was going to hit Sam's Club, but the line was outrageous. I decided to skip the gas then and headed home. When I got there, I saw the same Sam's Club gas pumps on the evening news. Looks like I made the right decision. So I waited until 8:30 tonight and hit another station. It was busy, but I found one pump free waiting for me. The guy at the pump in front of me was filling his Civic and a 5-gallon gas can. I guess nobody told him we don't have any gas reserve problems this time around. Then again, it doesn't hurt to be prepared.

As I have no desire to get in a fight for plywood, I skipped the whole mess at the home improvement stores. I hate those places, anyway.

It looks like Wednesday may be a day to stay home from work. If that's the case, I'll need more food. Another trip to Publix may suck, but I didn't want to stand in line for the deli today.